Kimra Sutton’s New Book ‘Grief in Its Journey’ Offers Hope and Healing Through Faith
Kimra awoke one Thursday morning to find that her husband, Dwight, was no more among the living. At that moment, she knew her life would never be the same.
As Kimra shares her journey through grief with you, you will find similarities and differences with your own experiences or that of others. Grief in Its Journey embraces the fact that each person’s journey through grief is a personal one. We all enter grief at a dark moment, but Kimra wants you to see that there is light at the edge of the darkness.
In Grief in Its Journey, Kimra opens her heart to share not only the pain and vulnerability of loss but also the profound joy and comfort she found in leaning on God. With grace and courage, she invites readers to walk with her through the darkest of valleys and discover that even in sorrow, light can be found.
“My desire is to help others realize they don’t have to walk this journey alone,” Kimra shares. “There’s a sweet God who loves us and wants to carry us through it.”
In each chapter, she not only shares the struggles of her own grief journey and the joy she found in leaning on God, but also how you, too, can find that joy.
Share your journey and challenges you have faced.
My grief journey started when I lost my father to cancer; I was 6 years old. By the time I was 23, I had lost my mom, my only male cousin, Jimmy, three grandfathers, and my great grandmother. Over the next 28 years, I lost my brother, Dale, three grandmothers, my “adopted dad,” my only uncle, Jim, close second cousins, and many friends, but my greatest loss took place on Thursday April 15, 2021 when my sweet husband, Dwight left this earth to meet our Savior, Jesus. It left me empty, lonely, depressed, and in agony. I suffered broken heart syndrome, but I clung to my Heavenly Father moment by moment.
In the first year after Dwight passed away, I faced some hard challenges. One of them was removing my wedding ring. Dwight had fulfilled our wedding vows “’til death do us part”. Seeing the ring on my finger weighed heavy on my heart. After talking it over with dear friends and my biblical counselor, I removed the ring and placed it in my jewelry box where it is to this day.
Another challenge was loneliness. It was a challenge for me to be in our home by myself. Dwight and I had been together for 15 years and married for 14 of those years. When I recognized I was feeling lonely, I went to my Bible to seek comfort. Two of the verses that encouraged me were Hebrews 13:5 and Isaiah 43:2 (ESV). “Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’” And “When you pass through the waters, l I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” Whenever I have faced challenges throughout my grief journey, I go to my Heavenly Father for comfort first and foremost.
Your new book “Grief in Its Journey” Offers Hope and Healing through Faith is truly powerful. Who inspired you to write your book?
My cousin Jane Seiling, an award-winning author, inspired me to write my book. She has been my cheerleader, prayer warrior, encourager, and surrogate mother for the past four years.
It all started when we were chatting one evening. She made the statement that I should write a book about my grief journey. “Who would want to hear about my journey?” I asked. She replied, “It is about honoring God and how he is working in your life.” I responded with a chuckle, “Alright, then, tell me how to do it.” She asked, “Do you have paper and pencil?” Three hours later, we hung up! I thank the Lord for Jane and her husband, Bill and for all their love and support.
Take us through your book. How did you find light in your darkest moments?
When I found Dwight, my sweet husband, in his recliner at 7:00 a.m. on Thursday, April 15, 2021, my first response was, “Father, I think you have Dwight with you.” Over the next half hour I cried, talked to Dwight and talked to my Heavenly Father. Before calling 911, I talked to God about how I wanted to heal well and heal well for him. I told him how much I needed his help if that were going to happen.
For the next week, I was in a fog, just trying to get through each day. I sought God’s face, read his Word and had a lot of conversations with him. I asked for wisdom in how to best support our children and grandchildren, as well as discernment regarding how to be gentle with Dwight’s family and my own as they were grieving, too. I asked God to carry me through each moment.
At the viewing and memorial service, I plastered on a smile, while still allowing the tears to fall. I received all of the hugs, condolences, “love you’s”, and “call if you need anything’s”, all the while my body, mind and soul were hurting! Even though I had people around me, I felt alone, but I knew all I had to do is call on my Heavenly Father, Abba, and he would minister to me. I sang a lot of hymns during this time, such as “It is Well with My Soul.”
Some of my struggles included going through Dwight’s belongings and giving them to friends and family or donating them. I was so lonely and I did not want to fall into needing to fill that void. Living in our home was a major struggle. We had spent six years renovating our home together. Every floor I walked on, he had walked on. Every wall I touched, he had touched.
Going to church by myself for the first several months was so hard. Dwight wasn’t there to walk in with me or sit beside me. He wasn’t singing next to me or listening to God’s Word and conversing with friends with me. In each of these struggles I always went to my sweet Abba. He showed me through his words and fellowship with my family and friends that he was providing for me and walking with me on the journey to healing well for him.
As we approached the end of the book God had me remind all of us how important it is to encourage one another. He shared through the Apostle Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (ESV), “Therefore, encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” “In the midst of our grief, it’s easy to get lost when we allow our emotions to take over. In that state, what we are thinking can be detrimental to our well-being. This is the time to be encouraged and built up through God’s Word. We can find joy in fellowshipping with family and friends, and most of all, other believers. Recognize the emotions and acknowledge them; work through them and talk about them; journal and ask God to help you navigate them in a healthy way. But don’t wallow in them!” (quote from “Grief in Its Journey.”).
Everyone’s grief journey is different, but there is hope. Lean into it and embrace it! Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” As you walk through your grief, however it looks and however long it takes, trust God. Cling to him and he will guide you.
How has God always been the cornerstone of your strength?
I accepted Jesus Christ as my personal Savior when I was very young, so in one sense, God has always been my cornerstone and strength. I have leaned on him to walk me through the many trials and losses in my life. As I dug deeper into his word, the Bible, he showed me that he is my rock, my salvation, and my fortress (Psalm 62:2), my comfort (Matthew 5:4) and my refuge and strength (Psalm 46:1).
God has always been there for me even when I was unable to express my love for him or when I fell to my knees with so much pain in my heart. He always picked me up and showed me his love.
“No two paths look the same, but healing is possible for all.” Explain.
Everyone experiences loss. It might look like a family member cutting ties for some, while others may lose a job, a home, a pet, friendships, or finances. Ultimately, we will all experience the death of a loved one or a friend. Our paths to loss and our paths after loss will look different.
Although I have experienced many losses in my 55-year lifespan, each of them is different, due to the relationship I had with each person. For example, my father died when I was six, while my mother died when I was 23. Both of them were vital in my life. They both loved me and took care of me. However, my path was twisted when my father passed away, because I lost that crucial father figure in my life. Divorce created a different kind of loss with the break in the family unit. The death of my husband Dwight created sorrow, due to loss of future plans and happiness.
But healing is possible through all types of loss. We have to be willing to recognize that we need Jesus to bring us through our grief. As we walk through each moment of the day, visiting memories of our loss(es), our mind and soul start to mend, and we can physically and mentally keep moving forward. I found focusing on God, praying, reading my Bible, attending church, helping others, and hanging out with family and friends gave me purpose and joy. I recognized part of my healing was showing others that you can heal one step, moment, hour, day, month, and year at a time.
What did you learn about yourself from writing your book? Would you encourage others to do the same?
I have learned that healing is possible from a devastating event, such as the one that I experienced in my life. I realized that I couldn’t do it by myself; I needed my Heavenly Father and a village of people to come alongside me, which, thankfully, continues to this day.
Writing “Grief in Its Journey” showed me that my Heavenly Father wanted me to see he is watching over me, and that I have hope. He showed me how to heal well and heal well for his glory.
I would encourage everyone to write about their experiences, even if they never write a book. Writing helps you to work through thoughts and emotions. Writing a book helps with the healing process for you and others who may be walking a similar path. So, pick up pen and paper or get out your computer and start writing!
Share your hope for readers of “Grief in Its Journey.” Where can we find your book?
My hope for the readers of “Grief in Its Journey” is that they recognize that grief is a natural process following loss. I want them to know that the Lord is with them, and if they trust him, he will bring them through it. I would discourage them from comparing their grief with others’. I would encourage them to consider getting help from a biblical counselor and attending a Grief Share group. I want them to know that the light at the end of the tunnel is Jesus, and he wants to bring you through to the other side.
My book can be found at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Books-A-Million. Contact me on my website: withhisgraceandmercy.weebly.com
withhisgraceandmercy.weebly.com
